Oh Happy Day!

After 6 years of doing laundry at either my parents' house or at the coin-op laundry at our various apartment buildings, we finally have our very own washer and dryer!

I suddenly feel so grown up. :) This was my Valentine's Day/birthday present from Andrew, and while some may turn their nose up at home appliances as romantic/birthday gifts, I certainly do not! Somehow I managed to remain very content with our laundry situation for 6 years, right up until a few days after Andrew told me to pick out a set. Then I all of a sudden could not understand how I had survived for so long like that. Now I no longer have to set aside a day to spend at my parents' doing laundry or (the more expensive alternative) trudging back and forth to the main building here to pay $2.50 per load of laundry. 

This comes at such a perfect time for us as I'm really not up to lugging around 6 baskets of laundry at 32 weeks pregnant. No. Thank. You. Plus, the nesting hormones have arrived early this time and I am really really enjoying being able to wash as much stuff as I want as often as I want! Curtains look a little dingy? Throw 'em in! Sheets smelling a little less fresh than I would like? Just wash them! Perfect! So easy! I am so loving this. Plus, once Little Aaron Gabriel arrives (have we mentioned yet that that's his name?), it'll be really handy for washing all of those little clothes and blankets!

People have already said, "Yeah, you'll love it for about a week." I know laundry won't be exciting forever, but I think that after 6 years I'll probably be loving it for a little longer than a week. Probably 3 or 4. And then when Aaron is born and I don't have to haul 3 kids + 6 baskets of laundry over to my parents', I'll fall in love with my new machines all over again. Thanks, Babe! 

Oh, and Mom and Dad, this doesn't mean we won't be coming over anymore. We'll just actually wait for you to invite us now. ;)

A comparison...

Here I am at 28 weeks today...

And here I was at 27 1/2 weeks with Eva...

Same? Different? I can't really tell... the different perspectives don't help, I suppose...

Pregnancy Progression

So here is our newest little one, just growing away. Well, I'm probably doing the most growing, but he's definitely getting bigger! Apparently it's been a month since I've taken a pregnancy photo, so I'll have to be fixing that sometime soon.

I hit 27 weeks today - beginning of the 3rd trimester! My due date is 3 months from today - April 24th. This little man is still enjoying all of the room he has to move around and changes positions by the minute. His favorite position seems to be something transverse, which I'm pretty sure is how Eva was too. He loves spending time up in my right ribs, which is making me a little nervous since I do still have 3 months to go and he's only going to get bigger! Neither of the girls liked my ribs, so we'll see how this one goes...

Christmas 2011

Back in May, I thought that Christmas was going to be the last big hurrah before our sweet little one was born. I was due January 22nd, 2012, and since I always get induced early, I was planning to have that tree down on January 1st so that we could have a week or so to get the house back to normal and all set up for Baby. I was so looking forward to this Holiday season and how especially exciting it would be.

Setting up the tree a few weeks ago was so bittersweet. I thought I'd be planning to take it down with my belly about to pop, struggling to reach things and not fall into the tree because I'd be so big. But, God had other plans for us and our little Amara. She (he?) gets to celebrate this Christmas (and all the ones hereafter) in Heaven. How awesome is that for her? We think that hearing a choir of hundreds sing Handel's Messiah in a great big cathedral is awesome, but imagine how it pales in comparison to what Amara is hearing the angels sing. We have our little nativity sets that we put out at this time of year, but our sweet little one gets to look on the actual face of Jesus this year. It's so hard to be without her, but it is so comforting knowing that my child is enjoying blessings that I can only dream of for now. Christmas won't be quite as exciting for us in so many ways as we had hoped, but it's infinitely more exciting for Amara. We miss our baby and wish we were only 6 weeks from getting to meet her, but we know she is experiencing something so much better than what her big sisters, little brother, or dad and I will be experiencing for many years (Lord willing).

And, speaking of her little brother, we are so infinitely thankful that though we're still 4 months out from meeting our newest little one, we have him. God has added to our numbers. He is in our family, and we are so thankful for this and the prospect of meeting him soon. He is a living proof of the promises and the blessings of God that can sometimes be spoken of glibly during this holiday season. As Andrew said tonight, this has probably been the hardest year of our lives together, but also the most blessed.  Two new little ones have joined our ranks, and we have strong hopes that we will be meeting one of them soon (and the promise of meeting the other when we get to Heaven). God has been kind, and we are eternally grateful for these kicks that I am feeling now.

Light and life to all He brings
Risen with healing in His wings
Mild He lays His glory by
Born that man no more may die
Born to raise the sons of earth
Born to give them second birth

Merry Christmas, little Amara!

Our Son!!

We had our "big" ultrasound today - I really hate calling it the "gender ultrasound" because that's only a tiny bit of what it's all about, and if you've ever found out anything bad at a 20 week ultrasound you know that the main point is to make sure that there is a healthy, thriving baby in there. Getting a look between the legs and knowing whether to paint in pink or blue is just an added bonus. But I digress. :) So! At our BIG ultrasound today, we found out that our little one is growing like a weed and measuring a full week ahead! This is bigger than either of the girls ever were and maybe that's because "it" is a BOY! I was honestly shocked. At first glimpse I thought I saw girl, but then the tech moved the wand a bit and hello! that is definitely all boy! Totally shocked, but so so excited! As friends have already said, it serves me right for calling the poor guy a "she". :) So Little Man is growing well on all counts which is a huge relief to us. The only minor abnormality she could find were some small calcifications in his heart, but those usually go away before birth and aren't anything to worry about. But, we'll get another ultrasound in a couple of months just to make sure everything is good to go. Thanks again for ALL of your prayers - we are so excited to able to give such a positive update like this and are continually in awe that we have the blessing of being able to experience all of this again. God has been so good to us and we are so excited to meet our little man!

I forgot to mention - he had hiccups during the ultrasound and it was very fun seeing his little belly going up and down. :) He was also pretty active, but I'm still having a hard time feeling it all. Part of that is because the placenta is in front, masking some of the kicks and such. 

Pathos

While Andrew and I were sitting and watching TV tonight, we heard these plaintive cries coming from the girls' room:

Eva: Mom? Dad? I wanna come snuggle youuuu. Mooooom? I wanna come snuggle youuuuu! *insert pathetic whimpers here*

2 minutes later...

Bella: Mom? Dad? Eva and I want to come snuggle with you because our bed is too comfortable.
Eva: Pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease????

Thanksgiving!

I'm pretty sure I won't get around to posting anything tomorrow, so I'll do a Thanksgiving post tonight!

First and foremost, I am thankful that 8 years ago tonight Andrew proposed and I said yes. I thought he was pretty hot stuff back then, but now I just kind of sit back in awe. When he proposed, he was a sophomore in college studying for his bachelor's degree in Athletic Training. I signed up for this party planning to go as an AT-C's wife. Now, here I am, married to a Physician Assistant (PA-C), AT-C, and ..... *wait for it* ..... the very first Ambulance Based Clinician (ABC) in the state of Idaho. My husband is amazing, and God has blessed us richly.

Next comes my imaginative little 5 year old. It's been strange, adjusting to her being gone for three hours a day. This week I'm thankful to have her home with me where we can sit around all day in our jammies watching TV and playing. I never realized how much fun school vacations can be when you're a grown up!!

Now we come to my energetic 2 year old. It's been a rough week for her - she started out with a cough that then went to croup and now we're treating her for pertussis (no official diagnosis yet, but that's what it's kinda looking like). Today I am thankful that she seems to be improving and isn't coughing up a lung every five minutes. It's so hard to hear them in so much pain! [Right now she's hanging off of my back as Bella tries to "get" her - I love sisters!]

As odd as it may sound, I'm also thankful for a baby in Heaven. I'm thankful that I can know without a doubt that that's where our Amara is, and I am looking forward to the day when I get to meet him/her. I am thankful for the promises that were made clear to us in Amara's death and the multitude of ways in which God has shown us His grace and mercy in the months since we said goodbye.

And last but not least, I am thankful for my first rib jabs today from our newest little addition. Baby tends to stay lower, but as I was hunched over and painting my nails this afternoon I guess my ribs started invading Baby's space a bit and she let me know with a very distinct kick to the ribs. Silly little thing. :) She's been quite active all day, actually (maybe it's just those bones ossifying), and I've been getting lots and lots of fun little kicks and rolls all over. I can't wait till she "tastes" Thanksgiving dinner tomorrow - I'm sure it'll be a circus in there then!

I'm also thankful today for the energy (thank you 2nd trimester!) to put together my share of contributions to Thanksgiving dinner! This year we'll have Spiced Apple Cake with Eggnog Sauce, Pumpkin Cheesecake with Marshmallow-Sour Cream Topping and Gingersnap Crust, Cinnamon Palmiers, and Navan Chocolate Truffles for dessert and I'll also be making Garnet Yams with Maple Syrup and Maple-Sugar Streusel along with a big huge heaping bowl of creamy, make-it-up-as-you-go mashed potatoes. :) It'll be a feast! Happy Thanksgiving!

16 Weeks!

While I'll technically be 16 weeks tomorrow, Baby is measuring a few days ahead so we'll jump the gun and just say 16 weeks for now. ;) Baby is looking very good and even gave us a little bit of a wave.

Baby's head is measuring the most ahead which is not surprising since the girls' heads were both measuring two or more weeks ahead by the time they were born. Looks like this one is right on track. We didn't get a good view of "what" it is because the umbilical cord was all bunched up between the legs and the legs were crossed, but we have another ultrasound at the beginning of December so hopefully we'll get a good view then. They were also able to verify that all of these Braxton Hicks contractions I'm having aren't doing anything, which is a huge relief. The longer we can postpone this from happening again, the better. The heart rate is remaining steady in the mid 150s and it is still such a sweet, sweet sound to hear. I'd like to write more, but it's been a loooong day so I'll sign off for now. Thanks for all of your continued prayers - the mean the world to us and God has been very kind!

Little Update

Here's just a quick update on our tiniest family member. I'm now into my 14th week, so just entering the 2nd trimester and eagerly awaiting the increase in energy. We heard the heartbeat again last night and this morning, and while I've been feeling flutters so far I felt a good thump this afternoon, so we've got official movement now. My next ultrasound is in about two and a half weeks, so there's a slim chance that we may be able to get a glimpse of "what" this baby is which would be kinda fun. Then we can settle down on a name. :)

Heartbeats

Andrew was able to borrow the doppler from work today so he brought it home and we were able to hear our sweet Baby #4's heartbeat, galloping along at a good strong 160. What a joy!

I remember one day, back at the end of June, just laying on the couch with Eva feeling her heart beat. After seeing Amara's still and silent heart, I had a new appreciation for the miracle that every beat is. Seeing and hearing the girls' heartbeats before they were born was fantastic and I even cried when we heard Eva's for the first time at 8 weeks, but I never had the opposite experience to compare it to. There is a term sometimes used for babies born after a miscarriage - they're called "rainbow babies". I think it's kind of  a goofy term, but the sentiment is true. These are the babies that wouldn't be here without the darkness and the storm. The beauty of the rainbow can only be seen in its context and against the backdrop of heavy, saturated storm clouds. They're not any more important than "normal" babies, but they are an especially beautiful and merciful blessing in their context. We are still saddened by the death of our little Amara, but we are clinging to the promises of God as we continue to pray for this little one and thank Him for his many blessings to us.

Hearing a heartbeat tonight was wonderful and I think that as we near the end of the first trimester (I'm 11 weeks today) I am gradually becoming more and more at ease. Every little twinge still freaks me out, but not quite as much as they did a few weeks ago. I even went so far as to buy some new white onesies and newborn side-snap tees that were on clearance today at Wal-Mart. As the weather is cooling down I'm also starting to plan some knitting projects for this little one (Fall and Winter always inspire me to knit). I may as well go on record now and say that I'm thinking this will be another girl, considering that this pregnancy is feeling so very similar to the one I had with Eva. But then, we were convinced that Eva was a boy since it was so different from my pregnancy with Bella, so who knows, maybe we'll be proven wrong again. The only problem with another girl is that we're having a horrible time coming up with girl names. Bella, however, has been very helpful and suggested "Sugar Sparkle" and "Persephone Ladybug" the other night in a family name brainstorming session.